I’m told that some groups are trying to get St. Patrick’s Day renamed to Shamrock day, supposedly out of concern for the religious implications of celebrating a Saint.

I spent a minute trying to think of what is actually religious about said holiday. It made my head hurt.

Listen, I’m weirded out by Catholics as much as the next guy, but really, who cares? Saint Patrick’s Day lost any and all deeper meaning the day someone invented the plastic neon green shamrock. The name doesn’t mean crap.

So I decided to spend yesterday evening consulting my own spiritual advisors. There are many spirits in my pantheon, but I decided to ask Chardonnay, Sparkling White, and the almighty Gin. They suggest I begin a campaign to use the real religious name of the holiday, and so I shall.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I’ll see you next year on March 17th as we celebrate Get Wreckedmas. I’ll see you double then!